The Undressed Movement gives us something to do with all of the pain, grief, fear, regret, anger, confusion, and pure desolation that divorce can bring. Most of us live our whole lives dreaming of the dress and the fairytale ending. We don’t just dream about it- we have the perfect vision. We draw it, we talk about it, we watch shows about it, we spend days, weeks, and months searching for it, we save for it, we go into debt for it, we starve for it. It’s all about the dress.
But what happens when things don’t go as planned? What happens if we are one of the 40 – 50% of marriages that end in divorce? Some burn their dress to take back their power and mark a new chapter. For me, my journey isn’t so simple as to have a one-step solution as an answer. I am who I am, and I need more. I can’t let my dress become ash… I hate to admit it, but it means too much. I loved it at one point. It held all of my future dreams and hopes. I can’t just burn it to the ground. I needed to do more. As I journeyed through the years post-divorce, I realized there was so much more I could do- there was so much more that I needed to do.
And so I began. As I stitch each thread, embroider each bead, paint each stroke, attach each material, burn each mark, I feel the healing. (Yes, all present tense.) I take the psychological and emotional stress of divorce and physically let it exit my body onto the canvas that was supposed to be the start of a new life. I am taking back my power. I am choosing over and over again to think that I have not failed because I left the marriage. I am repeating it until my loudest dark voices can repeat it back to me. I can be whole again, and I can repair what was rightfully mine to begin with.
I invite you to join me on my journey as I- as we- move through what happens after everything falls apart. Let’s rebuild together.
I am Leah Rocker Chalhoub- let’s get undressed.